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Joke of the Day
"Are you today's date? Because you're 1/10, bye."
Next Joke
"You've got to hand it to midgets Because they cant reach it themselves"
"What is Ahmed Mohamed's favorite band? Dethklok"
"My GPS just did a shoulder shrug and said, ""uhm, take a left here?"" This can't be good."
"Who is 50 feet tall, has a blue ox and kills co-eds? Ted Bunyan."
"*releases helium-filled heart balloon* Me: You're free now Balloon: Ima choke a bird"
"Question: what is your best comeback to being called a motherf****r? examples: yes I did fuck your mom. Tell her hi. Tell her thanks for the crabs. Tell her I want the money she owes me."
"What do you call a Nazi who is social and moves freely at a party? Josef Mengeling"
"*slips the attendant $20* ""make sure you pick me out a good one"" Sir this is a daycare... ""uh huh *winks* a daycare"""
"Q: Men will brag that there are women waiting by the phone at this very moment for their call. Who are these women? A: Women working at 900 numbers."