218365

Joke of the Day

"He: That's a handsome dog. What's his name? She: Roger He: Does he bite? She: No He: How does he eat then?"

"snowflakes are like vaginas... each one unique... and I like them on my tongue.."

"so this cargo of brain transplants went missing and... uh... ... ah shit... lost my train of thought"

"What's the best way to reward a fat waitress? Cow tipping."

"It's depressing to think how much more Dora the Explorer has seen and done in her life compared to mine"

"What is the difference between snowman and snowwoman? snowballs"

"Whenever people say ""anything is possible"", I think about trying to staple pudding to a tree."

"What did 50 Cent say when Dr. Dre gave him a sweater? ""Gee, you knit?"""

"*Rolls window down* Cop: do you know why I pulled you over? Me: is it because I'm literally running down the street pretending to be a car?"

"I'm only gay for Jesus."