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Joke of the Day

"TacoBell - America's preferred over-the-counter laxative"

"Hitting the gym to release stress it's not nearly effective as hitting the cunt that causes the fucking stress"

"I used to hate my tumor But it grew on me."

"How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give the bitch a shovel."

"Pro Tip: If you leave an assortment of tissues, cold medicine, and a big bag of cough drops visible on your desk, coworkers will avoid you!"

"What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's arse? A mechanic."

"94% of my workout regimen is reading things online that make me so angry I shake"

"Why did the hipster burn the roof of his mouth? He ate his pizza before it was cool. (Written anonymously in the bathroom at work, a pizza joint.)"

"How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her? She found another women's lipstick on his knuckles."

"Why didn't anyone believe the transsexual's confession? It was a case of 'he said, she said'"