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Joke of the Day

"Lions do NOT share. If you try to give them half a hoagie, they will take it, plus your half, plus your arm, plus I am inside a lion."

"Why did the illiterate man with the 3 foot penis get dumped by his girlfriend? TLDR"

"My brother... Likes driving black and white F1 race cars. They call him the F1 racist."

"I'm not a Reddit admin... But 20 McNuggets is 20 McNuggets"

"There Once Was A Poet Named Bates, His poems weren't always first rate, His first lines weren't bad, but the problem he had, Was that he always tried to put too many syllables into the last line."

"What do you call a lazy fan of the old Price is Right? a Barker Lounger !"

"When I find myself saying something stupid, I finish by saying ""in this economy"" because that resonates with people in this economy."

"4-year-old: *puts on ballerina dress* *puts on ballerina shoes* *puts on ballerina tiara* Me: Who are you supposed to be? 4: A ninja."

"Why did the goal post get angry? Because the bar was rattled!"

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay $39 to have a garbanzo bean on my chest."