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Joke of the Day

"99% of women say they don't like men who wear leather pants. Which works out perfectly, since 100% of men who wear leather pants don't like women."

"I'll never forget my grandfather's last words.. ""Stop shaking the ladder you little shit"""

"Always live on the bottom floor it's further from heaven and harder for God to see you sinning"

"A man was found dead eight years after committing suicide Sort of proves his point, doesn't it?"

"[dog on trial for murder] lawyer: who's a good boy? dog: I am lawyer: your honor I rest my case"

"My grandfather died in a concentration camp in Nazi Germany... ... he fell from a watchtower when he got drunk again."

"A new report indicates Brazilians no longer support the 2016 Olympics They're too busy raising the team for the 2036 Special Olympics."

"What's the hardest thing about being a pedophile? Just trying to fit in, really."

"With all the ways to contact me on social media these days the police still smash through my door unannounced again?"

"What's the difference between a whore and a truck? The truck can only take the load from behind where as the whore can take it from anywhere."