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Joke of the Day

"The only reason a Hillary Clinton presidency would be good for our country At $0.78 cents to the dollar, she'd be a bargain for our country"

"What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it? Not much. It just gave a little whine."

"My cousin told me his gun club didn't cost any money. I asked him if it was run by wild chickens. He said, ""No, why?"" And I said, ""Because that would explain why it's a free range."""

"What do you call a Chinese lady with no legs? Dragon lips. And a Mexican lady with no legs? Consuelo."

"What do you get when combine a penis and a potato??? A dictator!"

"What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?"

"Top Gun was so unrealistic Everyone knows Tom Cruise can't reach the clutch on a motorcycle"

"angel: they seem to be doing well God: give them more diseases angel: is that really necess- God: and social anxiety and kill a gorilla"

"How do you cut a turd into 5 pieces? Squish it in your hand."

"Girls are never wrong. Until they are. Then they cry and are, somehow, not wrong again."