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Joke of the Day

"I didn't sleep a wink last night because my neighbor was screaming her head off. I think she doesn't like my basement."

"Have you ever heard about Mothers Against Drunk Driving's lesser known sister organization ""Fathers Against Drunk Driving""? Probably not, it didn't last very long, it was only a fad."

"How did Jesus get his beach bod for the summer? Cross fit"

"What do my girlfriend and Jesus have in common? Not sure if either of them came once, but I know they haven't come a second time."

"When men and women argue who's the most stubborn... Then men concede they are are, because they just don't want to argue this anymore."

"Being raised as a catholic was tough. As soon as I hit 12 I had acne come on my face, as did the priest."

"What did Chewy say after episode VII? I'm riding solo, I'm riding solo, I'm riding solo solo"

"Who clicks on ads? I do To report them."

"How do you make a hormone? Refuse to pay."

"Looks like the concierge is hitting on my wife again but who cares, this cherry danish I'm eating right now is on point nom nom nom!"