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Joke of the Day
"In no particular order = In exact order, but I don't want to piss off the people I put at the end."
Next Joke
"Heart melting love story: Boy: My wife & 2 kids. Heart melting love story: Boy: I can't marry u. My family is totally against it. Girl: Who r they 2 stop u? Boy: My wife & 2 kids."
"Life is a garden... Sometimes you have to put a hand on a hoe."
"So the other day I was throat fucking a black chick She said ""I can't breathe!"" I said ""Honey, lets not make this political."""
"Traffic shut down in many US cities today Have you ever seen a angry woman drive?"
"*mugger walks up* GIMME EVERYTHING YOU GOT! *mugger slowly walks away with $2.16 and a lifetime of anxiety & existential misunderstanding*"
"40 years later: - Grandpa, sing me a song of your youth. - Oppa Gangnam Style. Opp, opp, opp, opp!"
"Why do the Avengers keep calling Spiderman over to fix their computer? Because they heard he's a web developer"
"Facebook keeps asking me, ""What's on your mind?"", it's like dating someone with low self-esteem."
"What does a beer say when it's cold? Buuuurrrrrr!!!"