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Joke of the Day
"What's the longest word in the world? Smiles. There's a mile between each 's'."
Next Joke
"Never treat a woman like an object. It hates that."
"Life is like a dozen roses... it's full of pricks!"
"Our son came home one day with a note from his first grade teacher: Your son bit another boy today. Is he getting enough to eat at home ?"
"A woman walks into a bar... and says to the bartender, ""I'd like a beer please."" The bartender asks, ""Anheuser Busch?"" She responds, ""Just fine thanks, and how's your cock?"""
"Me*suspicious the neighbor is a cannibal*:""Do U find this is a tough neighborhood? Neighbor:""Na, u just use a slow cooker. Me:""What? n:""What"
"Did you hear about the new soda made out of people? ""Yeah, how's it taste?"" ""It varies from person to person."""
"Damn girl, did you fall from heaven? Because it looks like your face hit the ground first."
"I can accomplish great things if I apply myself... At least that's what a high school guidance counselor with a shit job and a bottle of whiskey in his desk told me once."
"A farmer asks the scarecrow if he likes his job ""Well... this job isn't for everyone..."" the scarecrow ponders, ""but hey... it's in my jeans"""