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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the new soda made out of people? ""Yeah, how's it taste?"" ""It varies from person to person."""

"Nice try, resealable potato chip bags."

"I don't always eat breakfast... But when I do, I prefer ""dos eggies."""

"Sorry I mixed 50,000 instant pudding packets into your above ground pool"

"My son touched my leg & said ""so soft!"" Then he asked for his IPad back & I gave it to him. Girls aren't exactly rocket science, guys."

"Last night I dreamed I was eating a pillow When I woke up, my 10 pound marshmallow was gone."

"How does the pope refer to his secret superhero identity? It's his altar ego."

"Walk up to random strangers on the street and say, ""I love your podcast!"" You'll make 3 out of 5 of them very happy."

"I got lit with my Tibetan friend once Once."

"Son, as a reward for graduating high-school at the top of your class, we've decided to pool or money and send you abroad! Son: Is she hot?"