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Joke of the Day

"If you say married people aren't having sex, you have obviously never sat in a hotel bar & watched them pick up strangers."

"I wonder what ""don't touch"" is in Braille."

"What did the hungry computer programmer say? All I want is one byte. Hell, I'll even take a nibble."

"Hermione Granger: What can I wear that won't make me look fat? Ronald Weasley: An invisibility cloak"

"Why did President Obama get two terms? Because every black man gets a longer sentence."

"I would've gotten away with it too if it wasn't for that group of sexually repressed potheads who kept talking to their great dane."

"My wife said that we need to have a talk after my 2 year old goes down for a nap so I filled her sippy cup with Red Bull."

"I was going to major in cosmetology.. ..but then they shut down the space program.. idiots."

"I have a deeply religious Muslim friend who knows the Qu'ran back to front Which is the way that the Koran is written. A surprisingly well informed joke about Islam (with apologies to Jimmy Carr)."

"Your tombstone should be carved in Comic Sans."