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Joke of the Day

"*pulls up to window* Me: *on phone* Ok, so you want a chocolate shake also? Ok, I'll get two then. *phone rings while its at my ear*"

"I deliver jokes the same way UPS delivers packages... ...mangled and missing the most important parts."

"How did the hipster burn his fingertips? He was changing the lightbulb before it was cool. [rimshot]"

"Did you hear the joke about the deaf idiot? Neither did he."

"How do you know if a guy has an asian wife? He'll tell you."

"The best way to remember your 21st birthday, is not at all. Have fun blacking out."

"My penis was in the Guinness Book of World Records.... But then the librarian told me to take it out..."

"dave is coming over ""normal dave or dave whos alwayes doing impressions of evrybody we know"" [from outside] hi guyes, its normal dave ""noooo"

"they probably named the Rocky mountains first and then saw all the other mountains and were like ""oh"""

"What is Donald Trump's favorite city to visit. Islamabad"