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Joke of the Day

"Should have been called ""Star Wars: The Missing Force Kin"" Because it's all about looking for her Jedi brother."

"What happens when you pet a cat in the opposite direction? You rub them the wrong way"

"Where's Finnick? Odair he is! Obligatory: My brother told this to me while watching Mockingjay P2."

"What does a sailor use to clean his clothes? Tide"

"My wife accused me of being immature... I told her to get out of my fort."

"What is the easiest way for a stressed astronaut to unwind and decompress? By opening the door."

"Why did Brazil lose the World Cup? Weak back."

"I judge parties by how close to dead my cell phone battery is when I leave."

"Are anti-jokes still funny? Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead"

"*puts on Rocky theme music* *cracks neck* *cracks knuckles* *stretches* *jogs in place* *picks up phone to call mom*"