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Joke of the Day

"Have you heard about the new restaurant on Mars? The atmosphere was ok, but the place looked a bit rusty."

"Is this math joke going to be bad? Paraboly"

"How do you catch a unique lion? Unique up on him. How do you catch a tame lion? tame way! Zingo!"

"such a hipster... they were into Adele before she got big."

"[God making a planet for the first time and just constantly screwing things up] Ugh, first world problems."

"Ever wonder why you don't see the energizer bunny anymore? He got arrested for battery."

"Do you know the worst part about drinking bleach? It never gets pass the noose."

"How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one...but the light bulb has to WANT to change."

"What's the most common question in a Gay Bar? Can i push in your stool?"

"How long have I been working for this company? Ever since they threatened to fire me."