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Joke of the Day

"""nice dog or cat or baby or whatever"" i offer politely, my eyes scanning the room for the taco dip. ""was it expensive?"""

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"Why don't the post office get the Jehovah's Witnesses to deliver the mail on Saturday? Work smarter not harder people."
"After being shown around, the prison warden was asked for his opinion on the prisoners' new creative writing class. ...""It has its prose & cons"""
"What is the hardest part about bring a pedophile Fitting in btw meant being not bring"
"Why did the ghost go to the bar? For the BOOOOze."
"A Pervert, A Con Artist and a Fascist walk into a bar... ..The Bartender Says, ""What'll it be Mr. President Trump?"""
"When I worked at a pickle factory, I stuck my penis inside of a pickle slicer... They ended up firing both of us."
"I prevented a rape today I gave my consent."
"What's the difference between Donald Trump and a bucket of shit? The bucket."
"What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A bad golfer goes *whack* ""damn"" and a bad skydiver goes ""damn"" *whack*"