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Joke of the Day

"An English, an Irish and a Scottish went to a bar... I am waiting they to come back to finish the joke"

"How do you know if someone was in the navy? Oh don't worry, they'll tell you."

"Just ate some lipgloss so i can enhance my inner beauty"

"A third-party vote walks out of a bar... He says ""Wow, I'm wasted."""

"Watch The Walking Dead with someone who's super into it so every time a zombie appears you can pull the old, ""Wait, who's this now?"""

"""Describe yourself in three words"" ""Lazy"""

"I thought 50 shades of gray was just a makeup application guide for goth chicks"

"Is Viagra classified as a soft drug, or a hard drug?"

"I wonder what TSA would do if I brought a block of ice through airport security. My physics teacher said it's not a liquid."

"If the dove is the bird of peace... ...what is the bird of true love? The swallow."