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Joke of the Day

"What is it called when you think you see a popstar in the desert? It's a Nicki Mirage."

"Want to hear a broad generalization? All women are complicated."

"If they just built prisons out of the shit they package electronics in, no one would ever escape."

"What do you call an aroused eskimo dwarf? A frigid midget with a rigid digit."

"What do you call an aborted Czechoslovakian? A cancelled Chzeck."

"*Pulls your panties to the side* *Tries to remember how I even ended up wearing your panties*"

"[On a date] *Don't let her know you're a dog* Girl: Do you want to...maybe go for a walk after this? *starts running in circles going crazy*"

"American cheese is just regular cheese that's not afraid to fight for freedom! Also, it's fatter than the other cheeses. And more racist."

"It's hard to explain puns... It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally."

"Why I hated my trip to Canada It was a nice country, but as soon as I saw the flag is just wanted to *leaf*"