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Joke of the Day
"The rest of you just need to get fat because I don't feel like going to the gym anymore..."
Next Joke
"What do you call two doctors with the same career? Pair of medics."
"Politicians should be limited to two terms... One in office and one in prison. [Credit](http://www.reddit.com/r/news/comments/2jxula/alabama_state_house_speaker_indicted_on/clg2hjl)"
"Parenting is basically telling your kids they need to eat more fruit then telling them to quit eating all the fruit."
"What's bright, red and orange and looks good on hippies? Fire."
"Having a girlfriend is like having a car... ... I don't have a car :'(."
"When Miley Cyrus licks a sledgehammer, it's called ""art"" and ""music. When I do it, I'm ""drunk"" and ""have to leave Home Depot""."
"What's the real reason Lego Movie didn't get nominated for an Oscar? They thought it was called ""The Leo Movie""."
"Convince neighbours you're shrinking by walking past their window with progressively larger jars of hellmann's mayonnaise."
"Who is a presents favorite quarterback? Tim TeBOW"