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Joke of the Day

"Convince neighbours you're shrinking by walking past their window with progressively larger jars of hellmann's mayonnaise."

"Misty is in the shower and Brock is at the door knocking. What does Brock say? Ash told me you were in here and I should take a pikachu. I'm sorry..."

"If I was in StarWars I would probably just be that guy that keeps turning his lightsaber on and off and on and off like a pen."

"A guy never feels more like a pussy than when he's wearing a helmet while driving a motor scooter."

"I went to a seafood disco last week I ended up pulling a mussel."

"My gf texted me ""myspacebuttonisbrokenonmyphonecanyoupleasegivemeanalternative"" Do any of you know what ""ternative"" means?"

"I wonder if the first person to ever pop corn thought they were under attack."

"I have a Punjabi friend He Singhs very well"

"Playing dodgeball with kids is harder than it looks cause you have to throw them with both hands."

"Every crime show turns into sitcom when the cops bring the husband for questioning and he asks, ""Why would anyone want to kill their wife?"""