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Joke of the Day

"Why can you not shower with a Pokemon? Because they'll Pikachu"

"If you're heartbroken, remember: There are plenty of fish in the sea. But I'd advise giving mankind another chance first."

"What's the best pun at a wood working convention I just got lathed"

"A spinoff of Zootopia would have lampooned any people from a certain fandom who drew NSFW pictures of the two leads and shipped them. Alas, *Furry Vengeance* was already taken."

"So I watched my first porno the other day... I'd have to say, damn I looked good."

"What did the banker use for birth control? His personality"

"That one about the three helium atoms is pretty funny. HeHeHe"

"I'm already 14 yrs old Dad! why don'y you buy me a bra? Shut up Peter!"

"What's the difference between the French and toast? You can make soldiers out of toast!"

"[looking at an old pic of me and my wife in college] Me: Wow, you used to be hot Wife: *death glare* Me: ...but not as hot as you are now"