200402
Joke of the Day
"That one about the three helium atoms is pretty funny. HeHeHe"
Next Joke
"DAE accidentally call the wrong replacement when you can't teach your classroom that day? Whoops, wrong sub"
"""Well well well."" - Me, answering three questions: 1.) How are you? 2.) What's your favorite adverb? 3.) Where'd you hide grandma?"
"Why is Whitney Houston good at video games? One of her strong suits is HAAND EEEEEEEYYYEEEE coordination."
"My wife calls me a ""five times a night"" man I've always had a weak bladder"
"Can clocks keep secrets? Time will tell."
"Alcohol does not make you fat. It makes you lean. Mostly against walls, tables, chairs, bars, floors & occasionally, weirdos .."
"Who is this Rorschach guy and why does he have so many pictures of my parents fighting?"
"How to insult an elder in the museum. Say ""I would shake your hand, but the sign says ""Do not touch the artifacts.""""."
"Everyday I get at least 3 people who follow me and then immediately delete their accounts. proposed theory: My tweets kill people."