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Joke of the Day

"I think it's bullcrap how Miley Cyrus can get naked, lick a sledge hammer, and people call it ""art"" and ""music"". Yet when I do it, I'm ""wasted"" and "" have to leave Home Depot""."

"Behind every HD picture of a girl, there is a friendzoned DSLR photographer boy :P"

"*gets to front of unemployment line* yes I'd like to be unemployed"

"I don't like referencing Not et al."

"They're saying I put a stuffed animal in the toilet. Untrue. I sent it on a mission to retrieve my toy cars."

"Last night, I got in touch with my inner self... That's the last time buying cheap toilet paper."

"Wonder which part of Batman's belt holds the bat-shaped throat lozenges he uses after speaking in his tough voice for long periods of time."

"If playing Grand Theft Auto makes you violent, why hasn't 25 years of me playing Madden made me a professional football player?"

"What did Cinderella say when she reached the ball? She choked."

"The masochist said to the sadist, ""Hurt me!"" and the sadist said ""No."""