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Joke of the Day

"I've got a message for all you ""migratory ducks"" out there: If you're going to come to our country, learn some freaking English."

"Today is my birthday and I turned 25 Jokes on me my insurance didn't go down."

"Hello. It's me. I was wondering if after all this time you still had all the money you owe me."

"Contrary to popular belief, it's actually the fat that makes you look fat. It was never the dress"

"Better be named after what? If you had to choose, would you prefer having a disease named after you, or be named after your mother in law?"

"Why do Italians wear gold chains? So they know where to stop shaving."

"A woman at work told me I look younger with my glasses off. I told her she looked younger with my glasses off, too."

"Why did the guitarist go to jail? For fingering a minor"

"Man, that's a cold joke... but, Icee what you did there."

"Piracy dates back to the 14th century, when armed criminals boarded ships and viciously watched movies that weren't out yet"