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Joke of the Day

"If my wife ever hired a private detective to follow me, it would be to get pictures of me not using the coupons I said I used."

"Chuck Norris can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time."

"Baby seal walks into a club... ..."

"Have you ever ordered a honeymoon salad? Lettuce Alone."

"What did they call taxi drivers in Nazi Germany? Ubermensch."

"A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants The bartender says, ""Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"" The pirate says, ""I don't know, but it's driving me nuts!"""

"How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it. Bahaha."

"According to FOX News, the Celtics lost because Obama did nothing to stop Kobe."

"What was the last thing that went through the fly's head when he hit the windshield? His ass."

"""I JUST WANT TO PUT A BABY IN YOU!"" -me, trying to put a crib together"