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Joke of the Day
"You got acute appendicitis .. No, YOU got a cute appendicitis *winks at doctor*"
Next Joke
"I just installed a new app on my phone that lets me know which of my friends are racist. It's called 'Facebook'"
"Why did the black person cross the road? To fry the chicken."
"Well, I've got to hand it to you. -Guy explaining how the baton works in a relay race."
"Where do ghosts go for their holidays? The Dead Sea."
"First in my neighborhood to cut the grass and now the other husbands are looking at me like I reminded the teacher to assign homework."
"One of my last days in town and my girlfriend asks me what I want to do, and I say we could just sit around. She says what will we sit around?"
"How do we not know what women want yet? There are tons of conflicting lists all over the internet."
"""Waking up when you got a baby, you feel like you drank a bottle of whiskey the night before, except the shit's in someone else's pants."""
"They found a cure for pedophiles. They turn them into dyslexics... ... so they go around looking for Pop Tarts instead of tot parts."