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Joke of the Day

"Just wrote a musical composition about pedophiles... ""Dick"" in A minor"

"I just read more people are killed by toasters than sharks. So if you're swimming in the ocean and see a toaster SWIM FOR YOUR LIFE!"

"My neighbor stopped by to tell me my dogs had been chasing people on bicycles Bull shit, my dogs don't even have bicycles!"

"I was so sad and crying when I lost my playstation 3 but unfortunately, there was nobody to console me!"

"Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered 6 offender. ^(Saw it on Reddit before, if someone can find source I'll link it.)"

"Alarming new research into the growing sleep epidemic Over 99% of people are now addicted to sleep, admitting they engage in sleep at least twice a week, most say they couldn't live without it"

"Writing a Play I'm gonna write a musical made up of only puns and call it ""A Play On Words"""

"Baywatch Q: What do you call the space between Pamela Anderson's breasts? A: Silicon Valley."

"scared the postman i scared the postman today by showing up to the door completely naked. im not sure what scared him more, the fact that i was naked, or that i knew where he lived"

"A young boy died after having sex with his teacher... His friends high fived him to death. Zak galifinakorishdjignko"