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Joke of the Day

"I used to have a student who suffered from suicidal thoughts but now I don't."

"John is swinging Lisa around with a period of 0.5 revolutions per second. What happens when the period is increased? John Unexpectedly paints his walls red."

"What did the Eskimo lady ask her husband when they were having sex? Are you even Inuit?"

"Good for Christian Bale, visiting the victims of the Aurora, Colorado massacre. I heard some of them even got to meet Heath Ledger."

"I am sure I chose the right song for Richard's funeral Lonely Island - Dick in a Box"

"What do you call a psychiatric patient who is afraid of doors? Unhinged"

"My friend was arrested after carving equations into blocks of quartz He was charged with manufacture of crystal math"

"One day I'll cure blindness. You'll see! You'll all see!"

"So two cannibals are sitting in a forest, and one of them says to the other, ""Gee, I really hate my step-mom."" The other one replies ""Well why don't you try the potatoes?"""

"If I want to commit suicide, all I would do is jump from your EGO' to your IQ Level'."