201105

Joke of the Day

"The act of questioning can be intimidating. Isn't it?"

"I'm surprised that more people don't shoot at the signs on Target stores."

"Constipated people just don't give a shit."

"Did you hear about the TV show with FBI agents and witches? It's called The Hex-Files."

"Kind of a kid joke What kind of cereal do zombies like? Kellog's All Brain"

"How does a vampire get through life with only one fang? He has to grin and bare it."

"I thought I could take my dog with me to the gym today, but it didn't work out."

"I bet it turns out 100% of serial killers wore jeans to the gym."

"If you had a gun and you were being chased by a bull and a mountain lion which one would you shoot first? The mountain lion. You can always shoot the bull!"

"Twitter: where 20-year standup comedy vets get out-funnyed by accountants, college kids, junkies, & unemployed single moms on a daily basis."