200919

Joke of the Day

"Hey billy jokes? Need some more Billy & Highliner Jokes. One is ""Hey billy you ever been to sea"" ""No Captain Highliner but I have been blown ashore"""

"What was Hitler's favorite breakfast cereal? Reich Crispies."

"Gravity walks into a bar in space And shit goes **down**"

"My son and I don't get along. I call him a son of a bitch. He calls me a motherfucker. Technically we're both right."

"TIL that Paradise, Nevada was completely paved over at one point. To put up a parking lot"

"What did the octopus make for desert? ...Octopie"

"I'VE GOT GOATLIKE SPEED & REFLEXES ""Don't you mean catlike-"" BAAAH [Climbs on top of roof and begins eating shingles]"

"I hold my iPhone up outside your window to play our song. A 90 second ad plays first."

"Asian women look 16 forever and one day out of nowhere look 159 years old."

"What did the scornful owl say? Twit twoo."