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Joke of the Day
"Asian women look 16 forever and one day out of nowhere look 159 years old."
Next Joke
"Dr: your father is real sick Woman: [sobbing] how long? [her dad wheelies past on a bmx] Dr: almost six yards that time"
"I would make a sexist joke but... That would be wrong, and being wrong is for women."
"What happens to Nitrogen when you put it in direct sunlight? It becomes DAYTROGEN!"
"Whats the name of the arachnid playwright?"
"What happens when you put 6 city workers and 6 lesbians in a room together? You get a dozen people who don't do dick"
"[at the aquarium] Son [pointing at a large tank]: daddy what's that Me: tank Son: no what lives in the tank Me: water"
"What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a supermodel? Nothing if her husband knows what's good for him!"
"Why do they use liquid soap in the Navy? Takes longer to pick up."
"Apparently the capital of Israel is totally impoverished. It's a real Jerusaslum"