2798

Joke of the Day

"I'VE GOT GOATLIKE SPEED & REFLEXES ""Don't you mean catlike-"" BAAAH [Climbs on top of roof and begins eating shingles]"

"What is a Farmer's favorite pick-up line? Girl. You look so good that I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all!"

"According to the customer service, the cable guy should be here sometime between 10:00 a.m. and the return of Christ."

"Kanye and Kim name their first child North West... ....in hopes that it will one day be the lead singer for One Direction"

"*Tries to warm up car* Car: I have a boyfriend"

"If you were on top of a pile of gay guys... would you get off?"

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, you're good. Fool me four times, WOW! Did you major in fooling?"

"What's the difference between a chick and a woman? The chick says ""cock-a-doodle-do"", and the woman says "" any-cock-will-do"""

"Tell me a sick joke Whatever type of 'sick' humor - gross, racist, etc. All is fair on this thread."

"Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are on a boat. The boat sinks. Who survives? America."