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Joke of the Day
"Gravity walks into a bar in space And shit goes **down**"
Next Joke
"Whats the difference between an irish wake and an irish wedding??? One less drunk"
"Saw sign in yoga store: Do One Thing A Day That Scares You. So today I start raping coyotes."
"My friend asked me to name my top 5 Coldplay songs... And they were all yellow."
"I just bought a sewing machine I needed to get my sheet together"
"If you lose one senses, your other senses become stronger. That's why people without a sense of humour have such a high sense of self importance"
"What do you get when ant's parents won't let him marry his girlfriend? Antelopes."
"ME: ""Trick or bear?"" NEIGHBOR: ""Bear?"" ME: ""HE HAS CHOSEN THE BEAR!"" [distant roar and sounds of clanking chains]"
"Why do police officers keep water in the automobile trunk? Because they don't want the siren to die."
"A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder.. The bartender looks at him and says, ""Wow, that's pretty cool! Where'd you get it?"" The parrot replies, ""In Africa, they're everywhere!"""