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Joke of the Day

"I put a life-size alien doll in my passenger seat for halloween and I've caught myself talking to it 3 times"

"Islam means peace! Stop means go, up means down, left means right."

"#MyRoommateIsWeird she keeps having babies and making me take care of them. She also insists I call her 'Wife'"

"As advertised I opened a can of evaporated milk today. It was empty."

"From a Christmas Cracker: What did the puppy say when it sat on sandpaper? Ruff"

"My vision is okish But in just a few years I'll be able to see 2020"

"Be that Shopping Cart with the bad wheel. Go in your own direction no matter how hard someone try's to push you in theirs."

"Why did Cersei Lannister sent princess Myrcella to Dorne? She knew her family history a little too well. Myrcella had two brothers."

"What did the judge order in his whiskey? Just ice"

"Why can't Ganondorf go on the internet? There are too many Links."