198830

Joke of the Day

"LPT: If you're considering trying BDSM with your SO, don't start at a costume party. Oops wrong sub"

"Good thing Brazil won...otherwise I'm pretty sure they would've just cancelled the rest of the World Cup."

"New Subway rule: You must give the person in front of you a wedgie if they take more than 5 seconds to choose what kind of bread they want."

"Something came in the mail today... My taxes"

"My girlfriend and I joke about which of us is more competitive. But, I joke about it waaaay more than her."

"I once thought I had a Japanese friend. But it was just my imagine Asian"

"How can you tell if a pilot is in the room?"

"I hit a kid with my car last night Then I realized it was only a goat."

"What is mozart doing nowadays? Decomposing"

"Can somebody help me? I have a drug problem... I ran out of heroin."