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Joke of the Day
"Break into your neighbor's house every night but don't take anything just put a cape on their dog"
Next Joke
"""You're not the pizza guy."" Bin Laden's last words."
"What do you call it when Superman craps his pants? Undy-terd."
"Doctor: What seems to be th- Me: -Medicinal marijuana! Doc: I'm sorry? Me: Let's start with the answer, then work on the problem, ok?"
"What did Matthew McConaughey say about Steve Bannon's followers? They're alt-right, alt-right, alt-right."
"Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Ask her to alphabetize a bag of M&Ms."
"Why we don't give food to cannibals.. ..because they know how to feed for themselves."
"Why would you pay $80 for a bra at Victoria's Secret when I can hold your boobs up all day for free."
"What do you call a big white bear with a hole in his middle ? A polo bear !"
"What's a difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher tells you to spit you gum out. The train says, ""Chew, chew, chew!"""