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Joke of the Day

"I just lost all my Pokemon cards in a house fire. I only have Ash now."

"Name a bird which doesn't lay eggs? any male bird"

"It's strange that most republicans are homophobic... especially when they're obsessed with screwing all the gay guys in the country."

"Act now to enjoy a false sense of urgency!"

"The captcha required for submitting isn't working. Since I post every few days, my human can do them for me. ERROR: CAPTCHA DETECTED."

"How many optimists does it take to change a light bulb? Who says it's dark?"

"So your face, is it permanently like that or are you genuinely surprised every time you take a selfie?"

"Why did the duck get kicked out of church? Because he was using fowl language!"

"I used to always do No Shave November At least until I started growing facial hair."

"Why does it take so long for a nun to get her clothes? It takes 21 days to make a habit."