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Joke of the Day

"People keep coming up to me & saying ""You have the right amount of hair my son."" Is this normal? Does anyone else have this problem? Hello??"

"A man goes to the zoo and the only exhibit is a dog... It was a shitzu"

"I just got an email that Netzero closed my account due to inactivity, I guess that must have taken 12 years to get here."

"My job blocked the Favstar website and I'm not sure if I should quit or take hostages. Haha! Jk. I'm totally taking hostages."

"I just went to an emotional wedding. even the cake was in tiers."

"When is bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When the big hand touches the little hand."

"A guy walks into a bar ""Ow,"" he says."

"Why didn't Hitler drink whisky? Because when he drank whisky, he got *mean*."

"I don't have bumper stickers because I don't believe in anything strongly enough to potentially get my car keyed."

"In Dublin, a very nervous Liam brings his girlfriend to meet his father for the first time. Liam (to father): This is Amanda Father: A fooking WHAT!?"