197214

Joke of the Day

"My friend asked me what a Freudian Slip means. I told him, ""It's when you mean to say one thing, but fuck your mother."""

Next Joke
 
"Oh, I can't check my disobedient child with the rest of my luggage? You're saying I have to carry-on my wayward son?"
"What do you call an anorexic.. What do you call an anorexic chick with a yeast infection? Quarter-pounder with cheese"
"This one came to me this morning - How do you spot a necrophiliac at a funeral? Mourning wood."
"Is it strange how saying sentences backwards creates backwards sentences saying how strange it is?"
"Chuck Norris has never lost his virginity. Chuck Norris never loses."
"What do you get when you have sex with the Quaker Oats guy? Oatmeal Creme Pies."
"[arguing w girlfriend] Her: I feel like we have communication problems. Me: srsly? wow I text u like every day."
"Every woman I've ever been with only saw me the way they wanted to see me... ...in their rearview mirror."
"Why were the dyslexic lesbians frustrated? They kept trying 96 but couldn't make each other cum."