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Joke of the Day
"It's sad that they drain power from so many horses to make car engines run."
Next Joke
 
"Just because this is a public space doesn't mean my tweets are meant for ALL of you to read! Please respect my privacy at this time!!!"
"What's the shortest possible sentence in Canadian English? Sorry, eh."
"I sniffed my work shirt to see if it was too dirty. Unfortunately I work at a chloroform factory and woke up 6 hours late for my shift"
"Two sausages are sitting in a skillet... One sausage says to the other, ""It's getting a little hot in here..."" The other sausage turns to him and says, ""OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!"""
"Lion King is my favourite movie about an innocent baby animal. Being framed for murder."
"Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide. *bows*"
"I got in trouble once for copying another kid's test I guess the teacher heard my Xerox machine"
"Everyone, meet our new baby, Lucian ""Aww, what a nice name"" It's her dad's, so I picked his middle name ""What is it?"" Theskywithdiamonds"
"What is the difference between an onion and a hooker? I am not crying when chopping up the hooker. Thank you and goodbye forever!!"