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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a hooker and a crackhead? A hooker washes her crack and resells it."

"Simba was going too slow, so I told him to Mufasa."

"I went to the Optometrists to buy some glasses the other day, you'll never guess who I ran into... Everyone."

"there is nothing wrong with being nice, but there is something wrong with being nice to people."

"HELLO I SEE THAT YOU SLIGHTLY TOUCHED YOUR MOUSE WOULD YOU LIKE TO UPDATE JAVA?"

"My ex-wife still misses me... But her aim is getting better"

"Why didn't the bunny get the job as a marsupial? He wasn't koalafied!"

"Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide"

"Please do not power off or unplug your machine. Installing update 45 of 9484727192873828277362517293847265127826262827262726273633833727..."

"Decades of video games have left me WAY too confident in my ability to break open a wooden crate."