190931

Joke of the Day

"Helen Keller walks into a bar And a chair...and a table"

"Well, I just had this Epiphany, but I'm a little worried ... I think she might be underage."

"So I listened to some LL Cool J then kept licking my lips like he does. I found myself in HR. Good thing I wasn't listening to KISS."

"What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose? full."

"The problem in general terms is that people suck."

"What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water? Don't expect me to get hard in 3 minutes, I just got laid this morning."

"So, Noah found two polar bears in the Mideast? And after the flood, he took them back to Canada? That sounds plausible. #GodScience"

"I was at a barbecue party when a cow from a nearby farm charged me and chased me into a corner It was at that moment I realized my life was at steak"

"If I had $1.00 for each person I had sex with, I would pay my rent But just because I'm currently homeless"

"What did the Nazi officer say when he was captured? It's not me; it's Jew."