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Joke of the Day

"Two Centaurs Two centaurs are playing rough and things getting heated. Are they man-handling each other or just horsing around?"

"If you have that loud keyboard clicking sound enabled on your iPhone, give me your phone. You don't get a phone."

"I got into a fight against three people earlier and managed to knock one out... In hindsight, it probably wasn't the best time to masturbate."

"If you ever meet me please remember that I literally have a headache all the time"

"How much does automail cost? An arm and a leg."

"Dear Social Media, thanks for showing me that I can like people. So long as I don't have to see, touch, or smell them."

"What do Eric Clapton and Donald Trump have in common? They were both jealous of the size of a black man's crowd."

"Did you here about the IKEA corporation getting away with having that guy killed? None of the detectives could seem to piece the clues together."

"What's red and not there? No tomatoes."

"What's the most scandalous of the wonders of the ancient world? The Colossus of Scrotes."