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Joke of the Day

"People say Tinder users are perverts... ...but I think it's fantastic! I met my girlfriend of 18 months on there. I've been seeing her for a couple of weeks now and it's going great."

"Q: What do ya call a bunch of guys breaking into a music store and helping themselves to the stringed instruments? A: Luters."

"Who delivers presents to the hood? Crip Cringle."

"When I see people jogging outside I like to drive slowly down the road behind them blasting ""Eye of the Tiger"" just to give them motivation."

"I walked a girl down into the dark woods. She said it's very scary. I said how do you think i feel i have to walk back alone.."

"Why aren't any transvestites astronauts? Because in space, there's no drag.^please^dont^hurt^me."

"What's Gordon Ramsay's least favourite movie? ITS FUCKING FROZEN!"

"So, how do you like your job as an elevator repairman? Meh, it has its ups and downs"

"Don't you hate it when you put a freshly baked pie on the windowsill to cool and a cartoon character steals it?"

"I've finally figured out why I can't lose this extra weight. The shampoo I use in shower that runs down my body says, ""4 extra volume & body"