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Joke of the Day

"Hey girl are you from Tennessee? Because I was wondering if you'd still be interested in me if I wasn't your cousin"

"Where does monty python buy his water? From the knights Da-sa(y)-NI! This joke is best delivered verbally."

"What's the opposite of Christopher Walken Christopher Reeve"

"A friend asked me what I thought I would be doing in 4 years, I said I dunno... ...it's not like I have 2020 vision."

"Your call is important to us. Please continue to hold until your battery is dead."

"This just in: A white flag factory has burned to the ground in Paris... ... Effectively crippling the French military."

"Pink and wrinkly What's pink and wrinkly and hangs out your boxer shorts? Your grandma."

"Before having a kid the most important thing to ask yourself is ""Am I ready to watch the exact same cartoon on repeat for the next 4 years?"""

"What do you call a communist sniper Marxman"

"I'll take Manly Men for $500, Alex. ""Answer. These booklets of pages are a pointless waste of time."" What are instructions? ""Correct."""