189601

Joke of the Day

"GF: every time we fight you start interpretive dancing *i dance beautifully for 12 minutes* GF: I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!"

"Why aren't marriage prevention hotlines a thing?"

"What do you call an awkward questioner? I don't KNOW, that's why I **asked** you. God."

"What do you call a cocktail of iced tea and skittles? A trayvon martini. Yeah I thought that joke might GARNER some negative attention. It was a 1/5 joke. 3/5 with RICE."

"If I had a nickel for every GEICO commercial I've ever seen, I could buy us all car insurance."

"What's Varys the Spider's favorite OS? Unix"

"Why couldn't the accountant keep his car in working order? Because it broke down and he couldn't budget."

"She says she only drinks wine to collect corks for her Pinterest project, which is pretty cool cause it looks like she's building a castle."

"Why did the dung beetle go to rehab? He was rolling balls."

"Did you hear about corduroy pillow cases? They're making all the headlines! Never said it was a good joke..."