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Joke of the Day
"I was a house painter for five years I didn't think I'd ever finish that fucking house"
Next Joke
"How do you tittilate an ocelot? Oscillate its tit a lot."
"If I had a rooster, and you had a donkey, and your donkey ate my rooster's feet, what would we have? Two feet of my cock in your ass."
"How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. It's a hardware problem."
"""When you exit the bus please be sure to lower your head and watch your step."" ""If you miss your step and hit your head please lower your voice and watch your language. Thank you."""
"I know you've been looking at porn if you're staring at the Google homepage when I walk in."
"Q: What's the difference between a chainsaw and an accordion? A: A chainsaw can be tuned."
"Obama, The CIA, and Darpa walk into a bar... The End."
"I'm rich! But not in money, just in read receipts from my ex-boyfriend who never replies!"
"What's the difference between dog food and a hot dog? I have no idea..."