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Joke of the Day
"One Eskimo said to the other, ""Where is your mother from?"" The second Eskimo says ""Alaska."""
Next Joke
"I think my girlfriend wants it in the ear.... because every time I try to stick it in her mouth she turns her head."
"Girlfriend is having trouble opening an oyster at dinner. She hands it to me to open. Just as I pry it open, I say, ""The easiest way to open this is with a little mussel"""
"Worst Possible Baby Name: Adolf Judas Kardashian."
"A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says... ""Why the long face?"" The horse says, ""My wife was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer."" The bartender says, ""Holy shit! A talking horse!"""
"I bought a fancy new clock radio today. It cost me alarm and a leg."
"I hate it when I see an inflatable arm-flailing tube man and then I realize that he was actually flailing his arms at someone behind me."
"Why do so many Italian men wear mustaches? So they can look like their mothers."
"Jaden Smith"
"How many teenagers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None because it's already lit fam ^I'm^^so^^^sorry"