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Joke of the Day

"Why is Diego's slogan ""Go Diego Go"" It was the last thing his mother said before she got shot by the border patrol"

"I was always told by my father to fight fire with fire... ...And that's how he got kicked out of the fire brigade."

"Before you act, listen. Before you react, think. Before you spend, earn, Before you pray, forgive. Before you post, check for typos."

"What do you call a king's fart? Noble gas"

"What do you say when a virgin sneezes? Goesintight."

"10 just informed me that exercising releases inner-dolphins. If that's not a reason to exercise, then I don't know what is."

"What's the most obvious name you can give a Panda? Pan, duh!"

"My wife's always walking into things and getting hurt. Today it was our bedroom while I was fucking her sister."

"Ain't no sandwich when she's gone."

"*texts son ""dont say me"" as wife heads to his bedroom* wife to son: why did you put next years date on your science paper about time travel?"