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Joke of the Day

"I keep having these fantasies about the beautiful Lottery Lady on Saturday Evening TV ... .... No, not about winning the jackpot, I'm imagining her holding my balls in her hands."

"I like my women how I like my toll pass Funded and mounted"

"When I was a kid I was full of piss and vinegar... Now I'm just pissin' vinegar."

"What would Dorothy have said if she practiced Yoga instead of new age magical thinking? There's no place like OM."

"why google is a she? she have an answer for everything"

"I can't wait till next years veterans day: for the ones that didn't get captured...."

"God created the orgasm so women can whine when they're happy too."

"You know who are the best pussy magnets? Gynecologists.."

"When we were young, my brother was always better in everything. I never let it get me down though. Because I know I will always have more chromosomes than him!"

"Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs? The cow has the udder."