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Joke of the Day
"Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs? The cow has the udder."
Next Joke
"So I was sitting in traffic the other day... got run over."
"Sunbathing on the beach, the wife came up to me asked what I thought of her flip flops? Bloody horrible I said ""Put your bikini top back on"""
"Best thing about being a hermit? No peer pressure."
"A woman runs into a panhandler on the street... Panhandler: ""Would you please spare me some change? I haven't eaten in three days.."" Woman: ""Well, you've gotta force yourself."""
"How do you get a date on Tinder? Seriously guys, I've been trying for months so if anyone have any useful tips it would be much appreciated."
"Interviewer: how do you explain the long gap in your resume? Me: I fell asleep with my face on the spacebar"
"What do you call a Mexican who lost his car? Carlos!!"
"Pregnant. It's like ignant, but there are 2 of you."
"How many A.D.D kids does it take to change a lightbulb? WANNA RIDE BIKES?"